Will you RISK for Real Community?

Will you RISK for Real Community? When God calls us to himself, he calls us to community. It’s a community that is encouraging, refreshing, comforting, attracts Holy Spirit and makes love easy. We can’t ignore it during a difficult season and we can let this time purify it even more for us. Learn how in Will you RISK for Real Community?

Trevor H Lund is the founder of Live LIGHT Academy at https://livelight.ca and the Chief Storyteller at https://revtrev.com Subscribe and set notifications on https://revtrev.com/tv for past videos and live casts and https://revtrev.com/radio to subscribe to his podcast wherever you listen.

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TL/TL/DW Read Will you RISK for Real Community?

Ephesians 4:14-32 NLT 14 Then we will no longer be immature like children. We won’t be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth. 15 Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. 16 He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love. 17 With the Lord’s authority I say this: Live no longer as the Gentiles do, for they are hopelessly confused. 18 Their minds are full of darkness; they wander far from the life God gives because they have closed their minds and hardened their hearts against him. 19 They have no sense of shame. They live for lustful pleasure and eagerly practice every kind of impurity. 20 But that isn’t what you learned about Christ. 21 Since you have heard about Jesus and have learned the truth that comes from him, 22 throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. 23 Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. 24 Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy. 25 So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body. 26 And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.”[a] Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 for anger gives a foothold to the devil. 28 If you are a thief, quit stealing. Instead, use your hands for good hard work, and then give generously to others in need. 29 Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. 30 And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live. Remember, he has identified you as his own,[b] guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption. 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. 32 Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.

Back in 2021, When we first went into lock down I really felt I had to watch myself. I knew there would be decisions made out of fear and that I needed to make my own decisions based out of faith. I felt it was right for me not to die for the right to gather together to look at the back of each others heads. I knew we would be tested to have real community.

It can’t be about the show. It’s all about the go.

The Problem with RISK

The problem is that we have settled for superficial relationships. Most of us don’t know what real community is or why it’s so important for us. Most of us have been hurt in the past when we’ve risked ourselves. Most of us have little interest in putting ourselves out there to get hurt again.

Does it really matter?

Yes, it matters. It’s in real community we have wisdom (Ephesians 3:10 ) It’s in real community we get encouragement (Philemon 1:7) It’s in real community we have comfort (2 Corithians 1:4), it’s in real community we are challenge (Romans 14:19).

If we don’t choose to fight for real community we’ll lose the value of meeting together at all.

Our fight isn’s against decisions by politicians. It’s not against civil servants who implement those decisions. It’s not even against a virus or an authority that works from a stronghold of fear.

Our fight is against our ignorance, our experience and our compliancy.

We don’t know how good community can be.

We have all been hurt in community.

We’re not interested in putting the effort to build real community.

It can’t be about the show. It’s all about the go.

My Story about RISK

I was challenged before the pandemic to look at myself. I joined a coaching challenge put on by the guy who trained me to be a coach. He talked about being in a mastermind group to help develop his own business and meet his own goals.

I was intrigued by the idea …but had reservations. My health wasn’t doing that well and I didn’t know if I could follow through on commitments. I didn’t know who I could mesh with. I didn’t like the idea of accountability without pre-existing relationship.

But I did some investigation and I prayed about it and I asked some people about it. And I settled on the idea of meeting with one person - primarily because I had trouble meeting with more than one person at other times in my life. I was wanting to avoid conflicts in schedules and triangulation and thought one person would be a better experiment to try.

But who would I ask?

I’m a pastor or a coach to just about everyone I know. It is really hard for me to think about relationships I have had where I wasn’t the pastor or the coach. Even if that’s not how other people know me, it’s what my relationships become at some point.

For a time I was really at a loss.

I prayed about it and no one really jumped into my mind.

But I kept praying about it and one day I remembered someone from my past. As I thought about him, it became more and more obvious. I talked to Karen about approaching him and she thought it was a good idea. So just before we went to New Zealand I emailed him and we met on WhatsApp.

We had a great conversation before it got awkward. I basically asked him, “Will you be my friend.”

But wouldn’t you know it, God was making some huge changes in his life and he thought is would be great to meet together regularly and talk about all that he was doing as well.

What if?

It’s going to get awkward. It may be embarrassing. It often is uncomfortable.

It can’t be about the show. It’s all about the go.

But what if God is teaching His church the value of “when two or three are gathered in His name”?

What if it’s not about getting people into the doors of the church but it’s more about helping us all transform more and more into the image of Christ?

What if It’s not about the show, but it’s all about the go.

What if we marry the ideas

“When Christ calls us to Himself He calls us to community”

And

“When Christ calls us to Himself He bids us come and die”?

You see if community is saying “hi” and “how was your week” and then sharing the experience of looking at the back of someone else’s head - there is no reason for us to die to ourselves. There is no reason for us to become more and more like Jesus.

But when community is real community and you weep with those who weep and rejoice with those who rejoice and you get refreshed as you refresh others and you get blessed as you are blessing then transformation becomes inevitable.

You don’t need a large group to do that. In fact a large group hinders that type of spiritual growth. The way we do “church” has been the best way to transfer knowledge for almost 2000 years. One speaker and bunch of listeners - it hasn’t changed since the Greeks.

Today, podcasting has become an even more efficient way to transfer knowledge as it is assessable whenever there is a demand. You don’t have to show up Sunday morning. You no longer need to gather to acquire knowledge.

But community cannot not be simply about transferring knowledge. Christian community must be about transformation and that gets us back to the “where two or three are gathered.”

Jesus said,

Matthew 18:19-20 (HCSB) Again, I assure you: If two of you on earth agree about any matter that you pray for, it will be done for you by My Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there among them.”

When two or three of us meet together, we bring the authority of heaven to earth.

I’m going to let Bill Johnson’s thoughts come in here - Play video - Salt of the Earth

Imagine the RISK

Do you have have someone who you can agree with in prayer? Do you know they have your back to see God’s plans for you take place?

What would it feel like to have a relationship like that?

What would you risk to have a relationship like that?

How to have REAL Relationships Tool

RISK

R - Remember to Honour

I - Invite Wisdom. Ignore criticism.

S - Spirit led and Spirit empowered

K - Know when you refresh others you will yourself be refreshed.

Let’s unpack this...

R - Remember to Honour

In any real community honour is required. It’s looking out for someone’s needs ahead of your own. It’s calling out the gold you see in their lives. It is listening before speaking. It’s speaking the very words of God. It is choosing to be unoffendable AND authentic.

Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. Romans 12:10 (NLT)

I - Invite Wisdom. Ignore criticism.

Wisdom is applied knowledge. Together we have the mind of Christ. What is wisdom?

But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of righteousness. James 3:17-18 (NLT)

When it comes to criticism I’ve learned If I’m not looking for advice from someone I won’t let any criticism from them live rent-free in my head.

Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. Ephesians 4:2

S - Spirit led and Spirit empowered

When 2 or 3 are gathered in His name, it’s not just about accountability or commissary. It needs to be spirit led and empowered.

If anyone speaks, it should be as one who speaks God’s words; if anyone serves, it should be from the strength God provides, so that God may be glorified through Jesus Christ in everything. To Him belong the glory and the power forever and ever. Amen. 1 Peter 4:11 HCSB

K - Know when you refresh others you will yourself be refreshed.

Pray to both be a blessing and to be blessed. Look to be a blessing AND to be blessed.

The generous will prosper; those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed. Proverbs 11:25 (NLT)

The Challenge

Are you wanting a real community where 2 or 3 are gathered in His name?

Start asking God who you should approach.

Obey what you feel Him leading you to do.

You’re going to have to risk being awkward. But it is entirely worth it.

Going forward

Going forward as a church we need to recognize and celebrate and facilitate the two or three gathering in His name. It is the strength of the church. The power of agreement is real. We need to work with Holy Spirit to help transform the world around us.

Will you RISK for Real Community?

It can’t be about the show. It’s all about the go.

Father, I thank you that you give us wisdom when we ask for it. I thank you that you empower us to accomplish every good work prompted by faith. I pray Lord you’ll strengthen the encouragement in the relationships that are already gathering. I pray you’ll eliminate obstacles for those that want to meet but haven’t been able to regularly. I ask you’ll bring people to mind for those of us who have no idea who to partner with. I pray you’ll put people in our path if we really have no one of wisdom we can meet with. Thank you Father you will finish the good work started in us. Help us in Jesus name. Amen.

Carpe Vitae!

Negativity Fast Tips - How to fight with HONOUR

Today's Negativity Fast Tip. Battle negativity on noble terms—learn how to fight with HONOUR and maintain integrity in adversity!

Trevor Lund has helped over 10,000 people fast from negativity since 2006. Check out all the tips and tools to fast from negativity https://revtrev.link/tips Join the negativity fast at https://revtrev.link/fast and find out how to Live LIGHT Above the Negativity https://revtrev.link/bless

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Philippians 4:2-4 from The Message, and it says, "Don't push your way to the front. Don't sweet talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside and help others get ahead. Don't be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.”

When I was a young pastor, I started counselling. We did a lot of premarital counselling. One of the things that I would get couples to do is create rules for fighting because you are going to fight. You're going to go at it. Some of that homework that came back, it troubled me. So I said, "Okay, guys, no, let's take a time out. I'm going to give you rules for fighting, and the homework is going to be to practice these rules for fighting."

My goodness, people don't know how to treat each other. And it's not just couples. It is in the workplace. It is in the schools. It is wherever we are. If you are a follower of Christ, you can't live that way. You have got to line yourself up with the will of God expressed in scripture. His will for you is to honour all people.

So that's how we get the acronym HONOUR to help us remember how to honour all people. How do you honour when you fight?

Fight with HONOUR

‘H’ - is for you to hone in on the topic at hand. You speak to the situation. You say, "This is what you did and said, and this is why it disagree with it or it upset me." It's specific.

'O' is for 'Only speak words of life.' You cut out the sarcasm, the condemnation, the shame. Do not let those words come out of your mouth. Nothing should come out of your mouth that isn't for the building up of others.

'N' is for 'Never allow or return name-calling.' Resorting to name-calling is the same as placing curses on people. Don't do it to them, even if they started it. It's okay in the middle of an argument to say, "Okay, time out. I'm not accepting that name. I'm not accepting that label."

‘O’ is Operate in the present. Stop using “Always" and “Never” Nobody always, always, and nobody never, never. So quit using those words. So you operate in the present.

'U' is for 'Understand the other person.' This is why we spell it Canadian one way, right? Because we do need to understand the other person. You listen to what they're saying. You seek to understanding more than to be understood. Can you do that?

'R' is for 'Resolve the argument.' Not everything is going to be resolved, right? You're not going to get everyone to agree with you. You're not going to agree with them, but it's okay. They're allowed to have their own opinion. You don't go to bed angry. You don't bring up the argument with others to rally support or curry favour. You continue to person.

That's how you fight with HONOUR.

Next Steps

Live LIGHT Negativity Fast - Move from toxic negativity to life-giving positivity with 47 days of reflections and Devotional and Community. https://revtrev.link/fast

Live LIGHT Above the Negativity Course - Move from being easily regularly frustrated, usually feeling busy, often afraid or easily angered to having peace at all times and in every situation. https://revtrev.link/bless

Live LIGHT Tips and Tools to fast from Negativity - Are you looking to make a difference in the attitudes and actions in your everyday world? Get these Tips and Tools to help you Fast from Negativity https://revtrev.link/tips

Carpe Vitae!

How to Accept One Another

Accept One Another. The Bible is a powerful source that provides us with guidelines and principles to live by. It encourages us to show acceptance, kindness and love to one another. Acceptance of others can be difficult and challenging, but it is essential in living out a life that glorifies God. Learn how to Accept One Another in this message.

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Read How to Accept One Another

Accept One Another

Read Romans 14:1 - 15:13 NLT

Story about how to accept one another

In my first church we had something incredible happen time and time again. People who thought they knew the church told me it was stuck up and snobby and too old. But I knew it better.

What consistently happened was a young couple would start attending. They get involved in some way and in time they’d come to me to get their baby baptized.

I’d tell them “We don’t baptize babies we bless and dedication them?”

“What’s the difference?” they would ask.

Baptism is for believers. It for people who have said with their mouth “Jesus is Lord” and who have believed in their heart God raised him form the dead. It’s an outward sign of what has already happened inwardly.

“So what’s a baby dedication?” they’d ask.

A baby dedication has 3 parts. The first, you commit to raising the baby so it’s easy for them to say Jesus is Lord when they’re old enough. The second is those gathered agree to help you raise you child in a way that it becomes easy for them to say Jesus is Lord when they are old enough. The third is a blessing. Jesus took the little ones in his arms and bless them and we can bless them in Jesus’ name. It’s something real and tangible and it’s something we can do even if you’re not ready to say you want to raise them to make it easy for them to say Jesus is Lord.

Most times parents wanted the full deal.

So then we’d get back to baptism somehow and they’d realize they’d never been baptized as believers. So I’d tell them we can do both the same day. And they’d always get excited and I’d get excited. Then I’d remember I need to take down information and as I took it down I’d realize they didn’t have the same last name.

So I’d ask them about that and realize they aren’t married yet.

They have been in the church for six months or more. They had been involved and likely served and nobody thought to ask if they were married.

So we’d marry them the same weekend that we baptize them and dedicate their kids.

And it wasn’t anything I did that made this “dry, stuffy, old church” accept people for who they are and love them them into the kingdom.

I guess I did teach that “people needed to belong before they believed” but that church at that time got it and they ran with it.

I can remember 7 or 8 couples that this happened to. The last one, whoa, was that fun. The whole side was filled with unchurched gang members. It was one of my last service before we moved to New Zealand and I was lamenting to God the whole time.

The situation Paul addressed in Rome

The church in the new testament was volatile. It met in homes. There was no Bible codified yet. Most of the new testament is written because of problems going on in the church.

When Paul wrote to Rome he address an issue he heard about. That there was division because some people only ate vegetables and others ate meat, because meat was offered to idols. Some people thought the idols were nothing. Other people wanted to leave their old life behind. In the middle of it, they were treating each other like “If I’m right, you have to be wrong and I know I’m right.”

What we read was Paul telling them “We need each other more than we need to agree.”

How do we accept one another?

ACCEPT

A - Abandon Judging Rom. 14:1-4

C - Care more about people than you care about being right. Rom. 14:5-6

C - Choose to do what is best for everyone. Rom. 14:13; 19-21, Rom. 15:1

E - Empower them to do what’s right. Rom. 15:2

P - Perceive and receive God’s help. Rom. 15:5

T - Trust Christ has accepted you. Rom. 15:7

A - Abandon Judging

Stop the judging

Who are you to condemn someone else’s servants? Their own master will judge whether they stand or fall. And with the Lord’s help, they will stand and receive his approval. Romans 14:4 NLT

Have you ever felt judged and accepted at the same time?

We need to judge rightly, but we can’t condemn. Allow others to be different.

Accepting includes making others feel they belong.

“In essentials unity. In non-essentials liberty. In all things charity”

Am I judging rightly?

C - Care more about people than you care about being right.

Give room for differences of opinion on disputable matters.

Romans 14:5-6 In the same way, some think one day is more holy than another day, while others think every day is alike. You should each be fully convinced that whichever day you choose is acceptable. Those who worship the Lord on a special day do it to honor him. Those who eat any kind of food do so to honor the Lord, since they give thanks to God before eating. And those who refuse to eat certain foods also want to please the Lord and give thanks to God.

We need each other more than we need to agree on everything.

Can I care more about others than I do about being right?

C - Choose to do what is best for everyone.

Rom. 14:13 So let’s stop condemning each other. Decide instead to live in such a way that you will not cause another believer to stumble and fall.

Rom. 14:19-21 So then, let us aim for harmony in the church and try to build each other up. Don’t tear apart the work of God over what you eat. Remember, all foods are acceptable, but it is wrong to eat something if it makes another person stumble. It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything else if it might cause another believer to stumble.

Rom. 15:1 We who are strong must be considerate of those who are sensitive about things like this. We must not just please ourselves.

Some call it being an adult. But I’ve met too many adults who only look out for their own interests. It’s maturity to look out for others interests.

Do I look out for others interests or just my own?

E - Empower them to do what’s right.

Help them to do what’s right

Rom. 15:2 We should help others do what is right and build them up in the Lord.

It’s the Holy Spirit’s job to convict of sin, not yours. When they ask for help, give it to them. Remember it’s the kindness of God that leads us to repentance. Help them to do what’s right. Wait for them to ask for help to do what’s right.

Am I helping others to do what’s right?

P - Perceive and receive God’s help

God helps us.

Rom. 15:5 May God, who gives this patience and encouragement, help you live in complete harmony with each other, as is fitting for followers of Christ Jesus.

This is not “5 steps and be a more accepting person”, It’s one step, that’s to keep in step with Holy Spirit. He empowers us to accomplish every good work prompted by faith.

This isn’t in our own power and ability. It’s His power we need in us. The same power that raised Christ from the dead is alive in you.

Am I relying on God’s help?

T - Trust Christ has accepted you.

Accept as Christ as accepted you

Therefore, accept each other just as Christ has accepted you so that God will be given glory. Rom. 15:7

What does accept mean?

Philemon 1:17 So if you consider me your partner, welcome him as you would welcome me” (NLT).

The word “welcome” προσλαμβάνω (proslambano) is the exact same word and has the exact same meaning as “accept” προσλαμβάνω (proslambano) in Romans 15:7

Accepting one another is to receive another person with special concern and care and value.

Accepting others is welcoming them into your life as you would treat someone who is important in your life.

You didn’t have to change before Christ accepted you. It was his acceptance of you that allowed you to change. We have the same role with each other. As we accept each other because Christ has accepted us, we have the grace to allow each other to become more and more like Jesus.

Do I accept others like Christ has accepted me?

——

Conclusion of How to Accept One Another

The world has changed a lot since I was a young pastor. I don’t know if there’s a lot of young couples who want to raise their kids in church, even if they never were. Instead we have people that God loves that don’t feel welcomed in church gathering.

Most of them don’t think like we do or act like we do. Most of us don’t know what pronouns to use for them. Yet make no mistakes, Jesus died for them like he died for you. He did it make a way for us to be with him now and for eternity.

I don’t know if they’d ever come to the doors of a church. But they don’t turn down real gestures of friendship and they will not be someone’s project.

What if we were to have them into our homes and serve them food they’d appreciate? What if they’d become our friends and teach us things as they’d maybe learn from us?

What is God asking you to do to show you accept others just as Christ has accepted you?

Prayer - Soaking - Reflection

Blessing - Day 14 - Livecast - May you always live with honour…

The Blessing from the Book comes from Colossians 1:9. It reminds us that God wants us to have knowledge and wisdom. Sign up for the full course at http://revtrev.link/blessing #blessing #Bible #encourage #encouragement #hope #trust #faith

Watch Blessing - Day 14 - May you always live with honour…

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You were created to walk with God in the garden in the cool of the day. Sin came into the world and you bore the consequences. Jesus came and reversed the curse and took your place and invited you to take his yoke that is easy and his burden that is light. You are a child of God creation longs to be revealed. You are a living LIGHT. Don’t conform but be transformed, so you can have peace, and joy and hope at all times in every situation. Learn more http://revtrev.link/pathway

Verse

Colossians 1:10 (HCSB) so that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to Him, bearing fruit in every good work and growing in the knowledge of God.

Blessing

May the way you always live be with honour and please the Lord, and may your lives produce every kind of good fruit.

Reflection Question

Do I always live with honour?

Can I pray for you?

Father I thank you that you will finish the good work you have started in us. I thank you that by the grace of God we are who we are and your grace to us has not been without effect. I thank you that you are making us more and more into the image of your Son. Help us to celebrate every kind of good fruit others see in us. Amen.

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Honour One Another

Honour One Another. In the Bible, we're told to honour all people. But what does this mean? How can we honour someone who is different from us, or who has done something that we don't agree with? It's not always easy to honour those closest to us. We may not like them, or agree with them. But honouring one another is something that God calls us to do. Learn how you can honour one another in this message.

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Have you ever found it difficult to honour someone?

If you haven’t, you haven’t lived long enough knowing that when you follow Christ, it means you’re called to honour all people.

That doesn’t mean we don’t confront things that hurt others or keep them from finding God. Jesus did that when he cleansed the temple… twice. John records the first time he took his time to make a whip and chase everyone out of the court of the gentiles - which was the place non-jewish people could seek God. He said,

John 2:16 NLT Then, going over to the people who sold doves, he told them, “Get these things out of here. Stop turning my Father’s house into a marketplace!”

Temple’s Court of the Gentiles had very recently—perhaps as recently as A. D. 30—also been made available for such commerce; it appears that Caiaphas, the current High Priest, was responsible for this development.

Jesus was not confronting an ancient custom, but to an innovation introduced by the leader of those who opposed him

Matthew, Mark and Luke record the time Jesus did it again, during the passover when he would die.

Look at how each writer describes the event.

All three mention Jesus’ language was a little more harsh. Let me give you what Mark writes. Mark tells us after the triumphal entry he looked around and went back to Bethany because it was already late in the afternoon. The next morning on the way back to the temple, he cursed the fig tree.

Mark 11:17 NLT He said to them, “The Scriptures declare, ‘My Temple will be called a house of prayer for all nations,’ but you have turned it into a den of thieves.”

That’s more aggressive than the first time. It was intentional. It was strategic. It was to make a point. It wan’t enough for the Romans to come in force and put down an uprising, it was enough to get himself killed.

Mark 11:12 Jesus entered the Temple and began to drive out all the people buying and selling animals for sacrifice. He knocked over the tables of the money changers and the chairs of those selling doves.

Money changers were people who performed a needed service, but everyone knew they were cheats. Money with the face of a foreign god, or emperor made God, was not acceptable for the temple of YHWH. But you know - even today - you lose percentage coming and going. It was worse at the temple.

The ones selling doves…doves were the offering of the ones who couldn’t afford more. And Jesus was flipping over their chairs calling them a bunch of thieves.

Matthew mentions after this that

Matthew 21:14 The blind and the lame came to him in the Temple, and he healed them.

So he comes in intentionally. He targets what offends God. And then He starts healing people who were there to beg from others.

Then the teachers and leaders were indignant enough to come to him and tell him to stop what the children were saying.

Matthew 21:15-17 NLT The leading priests and the teachers of religious law saw these wonderful miracles and heard even the children in the Temple shouting, “Praise God for the Son of David.”

But the leaders were indignant. They asked Jesus, “Do you hear what these children are saying?”

“Yes,” Jesus replied. “Haven’t you ever read the Scriptures? For they say, ‘You have taught children and infants to give you praise.’” Then he returned to Bethany, where he stayed overnight.

Luke makes it clear that these events - the triumphal entry, the flipping over tables that confronted the ruling of Caiaphas, and the praise even from children for what He had done…these things help push Jewish leaders to kill Jesus.

Luke 19:47-48 After that, he taught daily in the Temple, but the leading priests, the teachers of religious law, and the other leaders of the people began planning how to kill him. But they could think of nothing, because all the people hung on every word he said.

So Jesus cleared them out with a whip at the start of His ministry, now at the end of His ministry He returns on a donkey and they lay palm branches and coats down. Then he comes in and starts flipping the tables, begins healing people and confronts the ones who want to confront him.

Why would I start a message called “Honour One Another” by looking at Jesus cleansing the temple?

That’s a great question. I asked it myself many times this week.

I was wrestling with this sermon for a while.

You see, I wanted to talk about how Jesus honoured his disciples when he cleaned them with His words.

I wanted to say, “Jesus honoured all people”. But I couldn’t get off my image of him cleansing the temple.

How is that Jesus honouring others?

Maybe a better question is WHO was Jesus honouring?

The first time John records, Jesus took the time to make the whip. It was intentional and strategic. It was the first passover at the start of His ministry and He sent a message to Caiaphas, and everyone who felt excluded by the High Priest’s new way of doing things.

The second time. It was also intentional, it was also strategic. Jesus left in the afternoon and came back the next day. Jesus was on God’s timetable. It was that passover he needed to die.

His ministry was only three years long. The Passover in the middle, he was in Galilee - walking on water and feeding the five thousand. He was far away from Jerusalem because it wasn’t his time.

I was thinking his cleansing of the temple was a spur of the moment reaction to injustice. NO

First off, anger isn’t sin. We’re told to not sin in our anger. Ephesians 4:26 It’s OK to be offended by what offends God, because what offends God is anything that hurts us or draws us away from him or keeps others from finding him. That’s the definition of sin, anything that hurts us, or draws us away from him or keeps others from finding him…basically anything that hurts us or hurts others.

We’re to confront sin, not opinions we disagree with.

The court of the gentiles was the closest place non-jewish people could get to God. And people who cheated others, did their business there. They cut off people’s access to God by what they did and where they were.

Jesus was honouring the Father when he intentionally and strategically cleansed the temple both times.

We may think we are honouring others by not confronting sin, but most the time we’re excusing ourselves from the tough conversations.

I want to have those conversation in relationship. I want to speak the truth in love. But I also teach how to honour when you excommunicate people and hand them over to satan, so, they can be taught not to blaspheme.

When we honour one another we need to honour God first. If we don’t honour God, the honour we show others, can seem a lot like blowing smoke.

Who we are to Honour

It’s easy for us to honour the honourable. We come by it naturally to esteem those worthy of respect.

But specifically , we’re told to honour our parents (Exodus 20:12) our wife (1 Peter 3:7), widows (1 Timothy 5:3 ), one another (Romans 12:10) , all people and kings and everyone in authority (1 Peter 2:17).

These people may not be worthy of honour.

• Peter wrote we should honour kings and the king he wrote about who would have him executed.

You may have people who should be worthy of honour treat you without honour.

• Our prime minister has labeled my views as extremist. I still need to honour him. Do you know how difficult it is NOT to share some memes and articles at times?

It’s tough to honour people who have chosen to treat you dishonourably

It’s easier to see the dishonourable the closer we are to them.

Jesus said only in his home town is a prophet without honour (Mark 6:1-6).

We judge those we know the best, the most harshly.

Does this really matter?

That’s another great question, I’m so glad you asked.

Yes it matters. Because one of the One Another commands in scripture is for us to honour one another above ourselves (Romans 12:10).

We live in a world that any conversation can devolve into an argument. Even the most trivial statements have people passionately fighting for it and against it. People are offended and highly offendable. And it’s not just in the world, it’s always - in my lifetime - been in the church.

We just don’t honour the ones who don’t do anything ever to upset us. We need to honour the ones God has put us together with, and as you know… life gets messy.

We see each other’s warts. We see the mistakes. We have a history with each other. And most of us, most the time, could honestly say “It takes less to tick me off (I’m sorry - ‘trigger me’) than it used to.”

And we need to honour one another above ourselves.

What does that look like? How can we practically do it?

Let’s see if can follow the example of Christ.

Jesus honoured his disciples…even when they did things that likely embarrass him.

Johns records, In the last time of teaching his disciples that Jesus talks about the vine and branches.

Cleaned disciples with His word

John 15:1-3 HCSB

“I am the true vine, and My Father is the vineyard keeper. Every branch in Me that does not produce fruit He removes, and He prunes every branch that produces fruit so that it will produce more fruit. You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you.

Let’s see how He used his words to trim back growth that not in line with his will.

James and John calling down fire;

Luke 9:51-56

As the time drew near for him to ascend to heaven, Jesus resolutely set out for Jerusalem. He sent messengers ahead to a Samaritan village to prepare for his arrival. But the people of the village did not welcome Jesus because he was on his way to Jerusalem. When James and John saw this, they said to Jesus, “Lord, should we call down fire from heaven to burn them up?” But Jesus turned and rebuked them. So they went on to another village.

Some manuscripts add an expanded conclusion to verse 55 and an additional sentence in verse 56: And he said, “You don’t realize what your hearts are like. 56 For the Son of Man has not come to destroy people’s lives, but to save them.”

We don’t know how Jesus rebuked them, but The Chosen series has a scene how it might have gone down…

[[Sons of Thunder video]]

Trim: Jesus rebuked them. He cleansed them with his word.

Or the time James and John asked to sit at right and left;

[[Request of James and John]]

Trim: the greatest among you needs to be the servant of all

Thomas doubting

[[Doubting Thomas]]

Trim: Blessed are those who do not see yet still believe

Peter Rebuking

Peter has the revelation that Jesus is the Christ, and 5 verses later is telling Jesus that He is wrong about being crucified. He agrees with Satan’s temptation to take the easy way out, don’t go through the cross. Jesus’ words were harsh, but most times we’re trimmed it seems harsh.

Trim: Get behind me Satan!

Jesus cleansed them, cleaned them, trimmed them with his word.

The good news is he cleanses us with His word as well. You and I can become less offended by others as we hear Him speak in His word and His presence.

Have you been spending time in His word?

Have you been spending time in his presence?

I find I don’t when I’m living offended at Him. But that’s not the point of the message today, just a little something to prick the conscious. Maybe Holy Spirit will us it to “Trim”

Today, I want to get to how we can practically and with Holy Spirit’s help Honour One Another.

How to Honour One Another

Holy Spirit empowers us to Honour all people. We can’t do it without His help. We can’t even honour one another without him empowering us to accomplish every good work prompted by faith.

Honour One Another Tool - LISTEN

The challenge: we talk at about 225 words/minute. We can listen at 500 words/minute. Our minds fill in the other 275 words if we’re not intentional and strategic.

The good news is you don’t have worry about showing someone you’re paying attention, if in fact you are paying attention. If you can do 1 of these things in your next conversation, you’ll start having better conversations.

L - Learn to be present Romans 12:10

I - Ignore pontification Proverbs 27:14

S - Segue with open questions Ephesians 4:29

T - Tune into Holy Spirit Galatians 5:25

E - Enjoy the interaction Romans 1:12

N - Nurture amazement 1 Thessalonians 5:11

L - Learn to be present

Romans 12:10 Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honouring each other.

Be present. Be in that moment. Don’t be half in it and half out of it.

Tip:

Put down the phone. Turn off notifications. Don’t walk away until conversation is over. You’re not listening if your down the hall doing something that popped into your head. If you can’t be present, reschedule.

Can I be present for this conversation?

I - Ignore pontification

Proverbs 27:14 A loud and cheerful greeting early in the morning will be taken as a curse!

You may know more than the person you’re talking to could ever know about a topic. Don’t pontificate. Assume you have something to learn. People don’t care about how much you know until they know how much you care.

Tip:

“True listening involves the setting aside of oneself” M Scott Peck

Can I keep my mouth shut and let them speak?

S - Segue with open questions

Ephesians 4:29 Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.

Have you ever noticed how many questions Jesus asked? Even though Jesus knew all things (John 16:30)—including people’s hearts (John 2:24–25)—he still asked over 300 questions in the Gospels.

What do you want me to do for you? (Matt 20:32).

Do you believe I can do this? (Matt 9:28).

Do you not yet understand? (Matt 16:8).

Why were you looking for me? (Luke 2:49).

What are you thinking in your hearts? (Luke 5:22).

How is it that you seek praise from one another and not seek the praise that comes from God? (John 5:44).

As Stephen Covey observed,

“Most people don’t listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”

Don’t assume your experience is there experience. It tends to shut people down. Segue with open-ended questions.

Tip:

Complicated questions bring back simple answers. Simple questions bring more thoughtful responses.

“How did you feel?” vs “You must have been terrified.”

How can I draw them out?

T - Tune into Holy Spirit

Galatians 5:25 Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives.

Be led by compassion. Ask yourself and Holy Spirit - What does God love about them?

Encourage them with what your compassion unlocks.

Tip:

Go with the flow. Don’t hold onto a question for a part of the conversation that’s been moved on from.

What does God love about them?

E - Enjoy the interaction

Romans 1:12 When we get together, I want to encourage you in your faith, but I also want to be encouraged by yours.

People respond to being heard. We like being seen and validated. It’s a joy to see the other enjoy the conversation.

Tip:

Stay out of the weeds. You can fact check later.

Try not to repeat yourself. It’s condescending and boring.

If you don’t know, say that you don’t know. Talk should not be cheap.

Do they seem to be enjoying the conversation?

N - Nurture amazement

1 Thessalonians 5:11

So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.

Be teachable. Be brief. Be interested in the other. Be prepared to be amazed. You’ll be encouraged as you encourage others, you’ll be blessed as you bless others.

Tip:

Seek to understand, not just be understood.

What have I learned and experienced?

It takes effort and energy to pay attention to someone. But if you can’t do that you’re not in a conversation, you’re just two people talking out barely related sentences in the same place.

L - Learn to be present Can I be present for this conversation?

I - Ignore pontification Can I keep my mouth shut and let them speak?

S - Segue with open questions How can I draw them out?

T - Tune into Holy Spirit What does God love about them?

E - Enjoy the interaction Do they seem to be enjoying the conversation?

N - Nurture amazement What have I learned and experienced?

If you can focus on one of these things, you’ll be having better conversations. You’ll be learning how to practically and powerfully Honour One Another. Try it out before we leave today.

Can I pray?

Blessing

Romans 15:5-6 May God, who gives this patience and encouragement, help you live in complete harmony with each other, as is fitting for followers of Christ Jesus. Then all of you can join together with one voice, giving praise and glory to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Blessing - Day 14 - Podcast - May you always live with honour…

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Listen to Blessing - Day 14 - May you always live with honour…

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You were created to walk with God in the garden in the cool of the day. Sin came into the world and you bore the consequences. Jesus came and reversed the curse and took your place and invited you to take his yoke that is easy and his burden that is light. You are a child of God creation longs to be revealed. You are a living LIGHT. Don’t conform but be transformed, so you can have peace, and joy and hope at all times in every situation. Learn more http://revtrev.link/pathway

Verse

Colossians 1:10 (HCSB) so that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to Him, bearing fruit in every good work and growing in the knowledge of God.

Blessing

May the way you always live be with honour and please the Lord, and may your lives produce every kind of good fruit.

Reflection Question

Do I always live with honour?

Can I pray for you?

Father I thank you that you will finish the good work you have started in us. I thank you that by the grace of God we are who we are and your grace to us has not been without effect. I thank you that you are making us more and more into the image of your Son. Help us to celebrate every kind of good fruit others see in us. Amen.

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How to Fight with HONOUR

All of us need to know how to fight with HONOUR. Learn how you can start doing it today.

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Verse on HONOUR

Philippians 2:2-4 The Message Don’t push your way to the front; don’t sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.

Thoughts on How to fight with HONOUR

When I started counselling couples, one of the first activities I had them do was to set up ground rules for fighting. If it was premarital counselling and the couple wasn’t living together the rules were a little airy-fairy. If the couple was in trouble they’d come back with rules, “Only slam the door once when you’re running away from the argument.

It didn’t take me long to develop this tool to give them. I’ve developed it further over time and encourage people to use it with whoever they need to confront about something. This works great to start any difficult conversation.

For couples I now recommend they dance their discussions. Either one can suggest a dance. Neither one can ever deny. Hold each other close, sway to some beat and don’t try to step on each others toes.

For non-married relationships we have tips to how to fight with HONOUR

Tips to How To Fight With HONOUR

Hone in on the topic at hand.

Speak to the situation “This is what you

did/said; this is why I disagree/it upset me.”

Only speak words of life.

Cut out the sarcasm, condemnation and shame.

Name calling and labels are never to be returned.

Resorting to name calling and labels is the same as placing curses on people. Don’t do it to them, even if they started it.

Operate in the present.

Avoid saying, “You always” and “You never”. Both are untrue and are used to simply cause pain. If you’re physically present with the person, look at them in the eye and don’t turn your back to them.

Understand the other person.

Listen to what they are saying. Reflect back what you think you hear and see. When they agreed you hear them, continue on.

Resolve the argument.

It’s OK to disagree. Allow them the right to hold their own opinion. Don’t go to bed angry. Don’t bring the argument up with others to rally support or curry pity; continue to honour the person. Remember it’s your job to choose to forgive and choose to bless.

Can I pray for you?

Holy Spirit thank you that you’ll give us the words to say whenever we need them. Thank you Jesus you’ll give us your love when we need more. Thank you Father you give us wisdom when we ask. Please be with those who are watching this because they need to confront someone about something. Help them to speak truth in love. Amen.

Next Step

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